How to Live the Soft Life Without Overspending

If you haven’t been living under a social media rock, you’ve probably heard the phrase “I’m living a soft life,” followed by a flurry of glowy selfies, spa dates, and restaurant galore.

The soft life is essentially a direct contrast and rebellion against the “hard” life, which is the norm of working yourself to the bone, followed by emotional withdrawal. The soft life evokes a sense of luxury—people that can afford to live comfortably without spending all hours working (which is not the majority of us). Self-enjoyment is what comes to mind, but in contrast to what’s portrayed in the media, it doesn’t have to involve elaborate shopping trips or vacations in Bali.

Self-enjoyment simply begs the question, “what do you enjoy by yourself?” 

“What makes you happy?”

We can choose to live the soft life without our wallets getting slimmer by the second.  Here’s how:

Go back to your Roots

I’m going to spare you the inner child narrative today and put this simply. What did you enjoy as a child?

The majority of the time, if you grew up with two parents in a healthy home, childhood is a relatively peaceful and joyous time. As children, we’re more fearless and have all the time in the world to engage in activities that curb our boredom.

We had hobbies. Whether that’s video games, collecting Pokemon cards, or proudly owning a ladybug collection— these are things we chose to do in our spare time, because we genuinely enjoyed them.

As we grow older, we engage in activities that are more likely to further us in life. Maybe you pick up a language, so you can travel to that foreign country with less embarrassment. Or perhaps you pick up books so you can become more knowledgeable about the world which aids in work environments or relationship-building. Point is, I believe there’s always an underlying motive behind the things we do as we get older. Everything has to have a reason, besides….. FUN!

For many of us in our twenties, fun refers to drinking and having a night out. That’s when we really let loose, but it’s not exactly the healthiest habit.

If you were given two hours of spare time in your day, what would you do?

My answer→ Netflix

But Netflix doesn’t bring me much joy. It’s a time-filler and a relaxant.

The things that genuinely bring me joy are similar to what brought me entertainment as a child. Scrapbooking and making imperfect things. Reading magazines and fiction.

If you’re struggling to find a hobby, I implore you to think back to your roots and I’m confident you can derive some variation of a hobby you used to like doing into the present.

Save the majority of your income

If you have the choice to do so, I would try to save as much money as you can when you get your first salaried position. I wouldn’t be spending outrageous amounts on rent or eating out every day. Save your money so you have more options later on. 

There’s one thing for me that’s worth the delayed gratification—and those are things like saving up for a really nice vacation, a home, or a car. A nice lengthy vacation will replenish your soul, a home will provide security, and a car will provide mobility.

Here’s what I learned from living on $10 a day. That’s the budget I gave myself throughout the week. And in reality, it’s all about perspective. $10 can be grossly small or large depending on how you see it.

$10 can barely buy you lunch here in Downtown, Vancouver, in fact, it’s almost unheard of. However, you can get a specialty coffee and a pretty elaborate pastry for less than $10. If you go for the latter, it’s more savory and luxurious than the first option. And because I love working from cafes, the second option works pretty well for me. I tend to eat my meals at home and now more so, make my own coffee (thanks to the splendid espresso machine we got). Plus, there’s such an abundance and variety of nice cafes in the city, that it can be an adventure in itself trying to visit them all.

If you constantly feel like you have to spend money to fill a void, it’s time to look inwards and find the root cause of that feeling. I know I’ve definitely been there. And yes, you can amplify and romanticize the small things in life that bring you personal joy.

Work Smarter, not Harder

I don’t believe in the whole quiet quitting thing. I think if you’re someone who favors personal growth, which I know you are because you’re reading this, then you would do anything in your power to rise in all aspects of your life. Quiet quitting and rising to your potential doesn’t really belong together in the same sentence.

However, the whole premise of soft life is not to work to the point where your soul literally becomes hardened.

That’s why I think priority setting and delegation are two very important things everyone can learn. Heck, if you can afford to get a virtual assistant, do it.

The point is you want to get the highest amount of output for the least amount of time, you want to focus your time on getting the most important things done.

Delegate your personal energy drainers (remember something that drains you, is another person’s favorite task) so you can focus on what you best excel. If you hate making social media content, delegate that to someone who excels at it. If you’re good a copywriting, the final project will have the best graphic design and writing (win-win!), for the equal amount of the time.

Conclusion

We’re all deserving of a life full of self-care and tenderness, and I must admit that sometimes working hard feels dichotomous to this concept of soft living. However, sometimes to ease ourselves from the stress and pain of working so hard, we turn to overindulgence and label that as the soft life we’re trying to pursue. In reality, we dig ourselves further into the cycle of overspending and having to work even harder to compensate for it. The alternative is that you can live a soft life without spending beyond your means. Learning to be still with yourself and finding activities that relieve some of those daily stressors from work and relationships can be the softest gift you can give yourself.

Live softly, my friends.